Inches lost, despite scale going UP...

OK, so I knew this would happen at some point on my weight loss journey.  The scale is staying the same.  In fact, it has gone UP, which is not cool at all.  When I was sick, I got down to 185 lbs.  I am now at 188. *sigh*  However, I took my measurements this morning and I cannot be too sad about them.  On March 5th, these were my measurements:

March 5th:

High Waist (just under ribs): 34 inches
Low Waist (at belly button): 40 inches
Hips: 43.5 inches
Thighs (at largest part): 25.25 inches
Arms: 11.75 inches
Bust at smallest part: 35.25 inches
Bust at largest part: 42 inches

And today...these are my measurements...

March 14th:

High Waist (just under ribs): 33.5 inches (- 0.5 inches)
Low Waist (at belly button):  39.75 inches (- 0.25 inches)
Hips: 43 inches (- 0.5 inches)
Thighs (at largest part): 25 inches (- 0.25 inches)
Arms: 11.75 inches (Stayed the same, which is great!!)
Bust at smallest part: 35 inches (- 0.25 inches)
Bust at largest part: 41.5 inches (- 0.5 inches)

Overall, despite the scale going up instead of down, I have lost a total of 2.25 inches in 9 days!!  All I have been doing is working out and eating the right way.  I have actually increased my calorie intake from 1200 to 1500 calories per day.  I just wasn't feeling satisfied at 1200 calories.  I felt tired, hungry, and grumpy all the time.  I'm also working on building muscle at this point, along with losing fat.  I have lost this weight by doing the Ripped in 30 workout...not the 30 Day Shred, which I have still yet to find.  It's somewhere around here.  I am so excited by these results, despite the fact that the scale is not moving.  As long as I am looking good and feeling good, I don't necessarily care what the number on the scale says. 

However, with that being said, I am 13 lbs away from what it says on my driver's license, which is 175 lbs.  I sure would love for that to not be a complete lie.  I am getting closer and closer.  When I went for that picture, I weighed well over 215, so that was a 40 lb lie.  Now it's only a 13 lb lie and I am so proud of myself for that!!

Ripped in 30 (Jillian Michaels)

I went to Target yesterday and was able to find the Jillian Michaels Ripped in 30 DVD for $9.  I brought it home and had every intention of starting it last night, but then I forgot that our tv in our basement, where I usually work out, was broken and we were in desperate need of a cleaning down there before we could move our other tv into the spot where the old tv was.  So, instead of working out last night, I spent the evening cleaning the basement.  We got the tv moved into position and ready to go.  So, this morning I popped in the DVD and got to work.  I set out with an idea that I would do week 1 twice.  Yeah, that didn't happen.  It was harder than I expected it to be!  There were a lot of push-ups and I have such weak wrists from years of gymnastics when I was little.  However, she also shows them modified, so that's how I did them.  It wasn't too bad, but not easy enough that I could do it twice in one day.  I will be sore tomorrow.  I am not sure that I will have time daily to do this, but I would like to do it 30 times and then post my results.  I am still going to be following my restricted diet of 1390 calories (net) per day and log those calories/workout through MyFitnessPal. 

   

Annoyed!

I have searched my house high & low for my 30 Day Shred DVD.  I have no idea where it went.  So now I have to come up with something else to do.  This is such a bummer because I was hoping to complete the 30 days.  Well, at least now I have my measurements all taken.  Yesterday I couldn't find the DVD so I did about half of Jillian's Banish Fat, Boost Metabolism DVD.  It is not my favorite, at all.  I don't like how long it is.  I am going to buy the Ripped in 30 DVD and start that.  I like that it will give you results in 30 days.  That is what I am wanting.  Wish I could find that darn 30 Day Shred, but as I was reading through the description of Ripped in 30 on Amazon.com, I think I might actually like it better than the 30 Day Shred.  So now I just have to wait for it to arrive.  I hate waiting....

30 Day Shred

I have owned Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred DVD for a very long time now.  I have done it a few times, but never the entire 30 days thru.  I am strongly considering starting tonight when we get home from my parents' house.  I have read a lot about it and I know there are 3 levels that you do for 10 days each.  I keep seeing all these phenomenal results online and I want those results too!  So I am going to start either tonight or tomorrow morning.  I know that it can be hard on my knees, so I need to be careful of that, but otherwise I think I'd enjoy seeing where I am in 30 days as compared to day 1.  Wish me luck!


Beginning of 30 Day Shred:

High Waist (just under ribs):        34 inches
Low Waist (at belly button):        40 inches
Hips:                                             43.5 inches
Thighs (at largest part):                25.25 inches
Arms:                                            11.75 inches
Bust at smallest part:                    35.25 inches
Bust at largest part:                      42 inches

Made the 180's...and 19 lbs in 19 wks!

I weighed in today. Guess what my friend the scale said?? 189.8!!!!!!! Hooray! I am back in the 180's. I am no longer in the 190s! It feels so freaking good!! I can't believe I started this blog over a year ago. My first post was December 3rd, 2010. In that year I have become a new person, I feel. Maybe not entirely, but health/eating wise. I have lost a total of 25 lbs and kept it off, for the most part. Sure, I gained weight over the holidays (who doesn't) and now it's finally off and I know that Christmas 2012 is going to have to be different. I am continuing to learn how/when/what to eat and what my body needs as far as exercise goes. There was a point in time where I just didn't really care. Mostly, I am feeling better about myself. I look thinner and I want to get even smaller. My goal is 170lbs. As of today I have 19 lbs to go. If I keep up my eating, the way I have been, I could be there by June 29th. Oh how I'd love to be there by the summer!! Hello, new wardrobe!! :o) Not only do I want to weigh 170 lbs, but I want to be toned. I have been doing a lot of arm work with weights, but I am not sure how to tone my legs properly. I have always had a lot of muscle in my legs and I am afraid that if I work them out too much, I will get She-Hulk sized thighs! LOL I want to that "long & lean" look, which I am reading is acheived by light weights with several reps. So that is what I am doing. 5 lbs weights with at least 3 sets of 15 reps per exercise. I am going to try and see if I can accomplish this goal of losing another 19 lbs in 19 weeks. So today is my start day!

Start date: February 17, 2012
End date: June 29, 2012

Starting weight: 189 lbs

Yesterday I started getting myself back on track. It's hard to get back into this when I've been letting myself go and not eating right & exercising. Let's face it...eating junk is AWESOME! At least in the moment. I love ice cream and sweets and just all sorts of junk. I know it's not good for me. Doesn't matter. I still love it with my whole soul!

Yesterday I went to FitClub. I ate really great, but I sure felt hungry most of the day. I burnt 650 calories at FitClub and consumed 1715 calories. Not too shabby!

Today, I burnt 275 calories through exercise, but haven't finished eating, of course. Not a big calorie burning day. :o(

I wish I could just not NEED food at all. Unfortunately, I need it to survive. I wish I knew why I am such an emotional eater.

I have been using MyFitnessPal since the beginning of the month and I have only lost one freaking pound. In MFP's defense, it is totally MY fault. I have been slacking on the eating, especially this week. It's been non-stop junk food! Oreos, ice cream, Sour Patch Kids. You name it, I've consumed it. I'm happy to say that I have not gained any weight, but I also have not lost any. So today I am getting back on track. I am logging my calories & my fitness. I took the dog on a walk. We did 1.54 miles in 25 minutes. That's not too bad! It's roughly a 16 minute mile. I sure feel like I'm going pretty fast. Of course this also takes into account the many stops we have to make for the dog to use the bathroom or just sniff around. My goal this week is to get back on track with eating & my water drinking and maybe lose a pound. If not, no biggie. I also need to get back into FitClub. I've missed a few days with other things that we had going on (son had strep, PTO meeting, etc), so I am really itching to get back into it. Wish me luck!

Well, this was my first week using MyFitnessPal to count calories and I am happy to say that I have lost 1 pound. I did my official weigh in Saturday morning and I was down to 190. Woohoo!! It's hard to stay under my calories if I don't exercise every single day. That's hard because I don't have extra time every single day to do so. I am soooo busy!! Time just gets away from me. I guess the thing to do is look at my overall weekly calories in vs. calories out and not my daily report. As long as I have a deficit of calories at the end of each WEEK, then I will lose weight, right? That's the idea anyway. We shall see! So far, I like the site and it's very user friendly. It also helps that I have friends who have joined and we can keep up with each other that way. Makes it nice to have someone who is holding you accountable. I went to FitClub this morning and worked my butt off. I love it! Wish I could do it every day!! Just need an extra hour or three in the day. ;o)

I am getting myself back on track.  I am still at 190 lbs, but I am working on getting back into the 180's.  I have been attending Fit Club, a program at our church, twice a week and we are doing workouts such as P90X and Insanity.  Stuff that makes me super sore!  Every time I get sore, my number on the scale goes up.  Not permanantly, but for a short time.  It's aggrivating, of course!  I am just doing what I can to stay healthy & active.  I'm doing my best.  I need to get back into the routine of logging my WW Points.  When I was doing that, weight was coming off like crazy.  So that is my goal.  My kids are both in school full time now, so I have no excuses!!

I am stuck at 189 lbs. This is so darn frustrating for me! I want to be at 170, but my body is not cooperating. I have started to work out and I am running 20 minutes 3 times per week and lifting weights. Why is it that I am going nowhere fast with my weight? The number is not dropping. It makes me want to give up and stuff my face with Oreos and icecream, but I won't. I don't want to go back to where I was when I started this blog...overweight, unhealthy, and not happy! I know I look better than I did before and my body is healthier. It's easier for me to run and I can tell I don't get winded as easily as I did before. However, I know that I am still considered "overweight". My BMI is 26.4, which puts me in that catagory of overweight. A normal BMI is 18.5-24.9. I would have to get down to 178 lbs to even be in that "normal" range. Kind of depressing. That's 11 lbs from where I am now. I would love to be in the normal range because I cannot remember the last time I weighed this little. I want so badly to be in the 170's. That would be perfect! I could be in the 170's and toned and I would be HAPPY!!! After all, I am 5'11", so I hide weight fairly well. Even at 189, most people don't guess I weigh this much. I am happy that my clothes are fitting better and I'm in a size 14, which I haven't been in a very long time. So I am thrilled, don't get me wrong. I just wish I wasn't stuck at this number. I've lost 25 lbs. That is a LOT and I am happy, but I want to get these last 19 lbs off! I can do it. It should be easy compared to the 25, but the last pounds are always the hardest. I must push through! I am determined to do this.

I am feeling totally depressed this morning. I had a horrible, horrible weekend, eating wise. I am back up to 192 lbs. I want to cry. I worked so hard to get this far and now I let myself get back to 192. The first BBQ we attended I thought, "Oh, I can let myself cheat a little. It's a holiday weekend!" That mentality didn't stop at the first BBQ though. I don't feel I ate horribly and I even passed up cookies! But it was more than my body wanted, I guess. I did workout yesterday though. I ran/walked 1.5 miles and then did weights for 20 minutes. I really didn't want to gain any weight this weekend, so I am kind of devastated by these 2 lbs. I really don't want 190 to be my plateau! Back on track this week. I'm hoping to lose 3 lbs by Friday. Is that doable? I don't even know. However, I know that Friday morning I am leaving for vacation. My Mom & I have planned to eat healthy and to workout in the pool. I do NOT want to get back up to 200 lbs, but I could totally see it happening if I am not super duper careful. Saying a prayer that God will help me to stay strong!

I think 190 lbs is my new 200 lbs. By that I mean I'll never get under 190 lbs and stay there. Before, I always struggled with the 200 lbs mark. It seemed like I could get to 200 and then never stay below. It seems that 190 is that new mark for me. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy I fell below 200 lbs and I am happy that I've now lost 24 lbs, but I want to be in the 180's. 188 lbs is my 10% marker (on WW). I get an award on their site for losing 10% of my body weight and I really want that award. So I am working hard. I started working out on Monday. I ran/walked for 20 minutes and then did weights. Today I only got in a 15 minute jog and weights before my oldest kiddo got up. I really want to get into the 180's. The next few days I really need to stick to my daily points allowance and not go over. Yesterday, I had ice cream which sent me way over my daily points. I dipped into my weekly points and it seems that when I do that, I do not lose weight like I should. Maybe once I'm on maintenance, then I can dip into those weekly points that I am alloted. I am trying not to let the numbers on the scale rule my happiness. The other day I was 190, today I am 191. There could be so many reasons for that 1 lb "gain". I did start working out and I know your muscles retain water when you work out and I know muscle weighs more than fat and blah, blah, blah. I am really just trying to look at the bigger picture. If I weigh 190 lbs and I am toned, then I shouldn't care about that number. If I weigh 170 and I'm flabby all over, I won't be as happy. Must look at the bigger overall picture here. This whole weight loss thing is such a mind game. My last official weigh in with WW was 191.2 lbs. I am over that today. I weighed in this morning at 191.6. I cannot be over 191.2 on Friday, my official weigh in day. That would just be depressing to see my graph go UP. I think I would cry. I do not want to gain any weight. So I will stick to the plan today and tomorrow and see if I can get down to around 189 by Friday's weigh in. I know that if I stick to the plan and I do not get to 189, then it's not my fault because I tried my hardest. Working out always does strange things to my body. I always gain weight, initially, and then it goes away and I either maintain or lose weight. I only have 15-20 lbs left to lose and I want to be toned. Ugh. This is so hard and now I feel like I'm just blabbing, so I am going to go clean while I have energy.

I hit 190.6 lbs today!! For some reason, the weight is starting to come off more slowly. In the beginning, I was losing over 2 lbs per week. Now it's slowing down. I still have another 20 lbs I would like to lose. I am also going to start working out today. I want to be honest and say that I am 100% scared to work out. I do not want to gain weight and it seems that when I work out, I gain weight. I really do not want to see that number on the scale go up. Especially since I am only at 190, which is still too close to 200 to be packing on any weight...even if it IS muscle weight. So I am frightened. I want to lift weights so I can start toning, but if I start to notice that scale creeping up, I'll have to back off. So I am sitting here before my workout already nervous and sweating! :oP I know I need to do it, no matter what. Exercise is not only good for helping lose weight, but also for your heart and at this point I'm pretty much sedentary...minus the cleaning & playing I do with my kids. I wish someone could design a workout plan just for me. Something that would help me tone & lose weight without bulking up or putting weight on!

In happier news, I've now lost a total of 24 lbs. This is super exciting and people are starting to notice! I went to a BBQ with people I haven't seen in almost a year and they were all commenting on my weight loss. My grandmother-in-law told me I didn't need to lose anymore, God love her!! I am very proud of myself. I know this last 20 lbs is going to be the hardest to get off. I still can't believe I weigh under 200 lbs. It's hard for me to wrap my head around the fact that I no longer wear a size 18...or a 16 even! I'm nervous to buy new clothes still because I'm afraid if I try something on and it doesn't fit that I am going to be upset since I've lost weight and it SHOULD fit. I guess we'll just have to see. I am also nervous about going on vacation. It's hard to be on vacation and try to eat healthy and workout. I do NOT want to gain on vacation. I cannot gain on vacation.

Alright...I've gotta stop procrastinating and get my workout done. Praying I don't gain weight. Please Lord, help me!!

*sigh* I really want to cry this week! I am not losing anything. I am so depressed over it and just totally bummed out. This is very disappointing. Every week since I have started WW, I have lost at least 2 lbs. Now here I am, stuck at 192. This is very upsetting. I don't know what's wrong!! Maybe I need to start working out? Maybe my body is saying, "OK...enough of this losing weight stuff. We wanna hold onto this cushion!!" I don't know. Something has to change. Maybe I need to eat less? Or maybe change what I am eating? I have to be honest...I have been having ice cream (sometimes 2) every night. It's at least the SmartOnes ice cream, but having 2 each night probably isn't the best. There are still fat & calories in them, even if I do have the Points left over for them. Maybe I should eat more fruit & veggies for snacks? Whatever it is, I wish I knew. I wish there was a computer in my body that could tell me what it needs me to do to get these last 22 lbs off!! Right now I just want to cry. My official weigh in day is Friday and I seriously doubt I'll lose anything by then.

So I am hopping back onto the weight loss wagon here. I have made myself work out 2 days this week and I am keeping track of my steps with a pedometer than I happened to find at the movie theater. After lots of disinfecting, it's now MINE! :o) Love free finds like that. I love how energized I feel after a workout. I want to keep going, but I know that I need to do other things with my time as well and working out for hours on end isn't going to be something that I can realistically keep up with. I will say that I look forward to when school starts this fall and my kids are both going from 7:25am-2:25pm! That is 7 whole hours of time for ME!!! I am envisioning a clean house, a svelte body, a pedicure or haircut! Wow. It's hard to believe!! So, anyway, to make a long story short, I am trying my hardest to get back into the swing of things. I really wish every holiday didn't revolve around candy & junk!!

Why do I keep putting it off? "Oh, I'll start back on this working out and dieting thing on Monday!" Really? Why not start today? I don't understand it. Am I afraid of failure? I really think so. My heart cannot take failure. I am afraid of disappointing those I love, even though they won't really even know I'm trying to lose weight. I'm just afraid that if people see me watching what I eat and working out, but the weight isn't coming off that I am going to look like a failure. Why am I even afraid of failing? Everyone fails at something or some point in their lives. I haven't really experienced real failure yet. I don't want this to be the first time for me. Sure, I've failed tests and haven't been able to do things perfectly, but a true failure for me would be trying my hardest to lose weight and not accomplishing it. I really need to lose at least 35 lbs. That's a minimum to be considered healthy. So it's a numbers game for me and I'm terrified that it might come down to where my body says, "Um, excuse me, we're only letting you lose 30 lbs!" and then I would feel like I failed because that last 5 lbs wouldn't come off. I have got to do this. I think it would help with so many other issues I have. So...I am starting today. Of course, I may not be able to eat the best, but I am going to make a conscious decision about what I put into my mouth. I may not be able to exercise, but I'm going to strive to take more steps today and get up and moving more. I think if I exercised more, I'd want to move around more and that all helps! So no more excuses...today I am starting over.

I am freaking sore...already. Not a good sign. I spent an hour and 10 minutes at the gym today. I did a mile run/walk on the treadmill and burnt a little over 100 calories. Then I switched over to the elliptical and burnt another 100+ calories. I did weights afterward and I can already feel it. I feel like I get a much better workout when I go to the gym, but I hate taking my kids with me. I hate that I have to constantly watch them and get off the machines to break up fights or take them to the bathroom. It's sooo frustrating! We use the free "family gym" area on base. It's basically a raquetball court that they have sectioned off. One side is where you stick your kids and there are toys & a huge flat-screen TV for them to watch. The other side is full of equipment. It's really nice that they have it, but I wish I could find a free gym that offered child care. Now THAT would be awesome!

As far as weight goes, I am back up to 207 lbs. Time to get serious again with this weight loss thing! This is my 2nd time being at the gym and I always feel so great after a workout. I wish it didn't take so darn long to burn all those calories though. I'd say I probably burnt a little over 300 caloires between the cardio and weights. That's a measly candy bar's worth of calories! Ugh. It's not fair how this works!!!

I'm still going to try to get down to 175 lbs by June. That means I have to lose 32 lbs. I have roughly 3 months to lose the weight. I will need to lose about 10 lbs per month, which is really only 2.5 lbs per week. I think that's doable, but I am not going to go insane over it. I just want to try my best and workout hard and eat what is good for me. I got some healthy snack food today (apples, oranges, pineapple, grapes, low-fat string cheese, etc.). I need to get back into the habit of making healthier choices. Before I "fell off the wagon", I was making smart decisions with my eating. I was getting the 6 inch sub at Subway instead of the foot long. I was getting a salad as my side instead of fries at Wendy's. Just stuff like that was making a difference! So, today I start back on my routine! Wish me luck...

I'm depressed. It's been a horrible week with my husband still not recovered from his septum repair. I'm struggling. Hard core. I cannot remember the last time I worked out. I have zero motivation and the miniature Reese's Cups my husband got me for Valentine's Day are calling my name at all hours. I just want to eat. I know it's because I'm stressed and super exhausted from handling two rough & tough little boys completely on my own. I have gained 4 lbs. FOUR. POUNDS. Unacceptable. I really would like to be at my goal weight by June. That gives me just over 3 months to lose 34 lbs. That is 11 lbs per month. 2.75 lbs per week. Is it doable? I am not sure. All I know is that I am tired of feeling so fat, weak, and exhausted. I cannot climb the stairs without getting winded. Pathetic for someone who is 30! I used to be in such great shape. I was able to play 90 minutes of competitive soccer without a break! I am pathetic. Time to do something about it!

It is sooo hard for me to resist sweets. This weekend we had my son's 5th birthday party. I had made brownies the day of his actual birthday and cake for the guests on Saturday. Cake is the only thing I can really resist because I don't like it, but I sure ate my weight in brownie sundaes. I mean, who doesn't love an ooey, gooey, warm, fudgey brownie topped with vanilla icecream and hot fudge? I could lick my computer screen right now just looking at this picture! I seriously ate two a day from the 20th thru the 22nd. I also didn't work out at ALL last week. There just wasn't time. Probably my own fault for not forcing myself to make time, but it seemed there were so many other "more important" things. That's how I always sabotage myself. So anyway, I was expecting to have gained at least 3 pounds when I stepped on the scale this morning. However, I was happily surprised to see that I was only up 1 pound! This truly excites me, despite the fact that it's a gain. That means that I was right in choosing all the other good foods for me! Even though I had the brownie sundaes, I still chose other meals/snacks that were healthy for me and over all, I came out OK! This tells me that if I keep up my exercise and I choose mostly healthy & good foods, then I can splurge on the occasional brownie sundae and it won't completely ruin me! For a while it seemed like having something like ice cream or brownies would never be possible for me again, but this goes to show that isn't the case! It makes doing this whole healthy lifestyle thing seem like it's going to be possible long-term. Right now...I really want a brownie sundae... LOL

Sooo....I did a weigh in yesterday morning and I was NOT happy with the number on the scale. It read 210.6 lbs. I wanted 210 to be the number I would never see again on the scale, but I am glad I didn't hold myself to that. I want to be at 200 lbs befor I say I'll never see 210 again. It's depressing when you feel like you're working super hard and you're seeing almost no results. It's very frustrating and I want to give up so badly, but I know I can't. My body is feeling the workouts and it feels GOOD to be sore and to get my heart rate up. I also know this will be good for my anxiety issues, as well as my blood pressure which tends to run a little high. I've really been working out hard. I added Level 2 to the Biggest Loser Bootcamp DVD I've been doing. My other 3 workout DVD should arrive within the next few days. I am very excited to get them. I really enjoy doing DVDs over walking aimlessly on the treadmill. I push myself harder when there is someone on a screen pushing me. I am hoping to drop at least 2 lbs within the next 2 weeks. That is my goal. I would like to weigh 208 lbs by January 20th, which is my youngest child's 5th birthday. I know I can do it. Must. Do. It.